Do you really mean what you say?

When I was a little girl, my mother taught me to never interrupt, except in an emergency.

Very clear, reasonable advice in pursuit of good manners which should only be put to one side in exceptional circumstances.

This however was somewhat lost on me as for many years (a number to embarrassing to own up to) I wholeheartedly believed that when an “emergency” was in session, it was ok to interrupt people; to announce heavy blood loss from one of my siblings or if I needed the lid off my pen. The context for the interruption was irrelevant, emergency in progress meant any interruption was allowed.

My wonderful mum meant what she said to me that day and it was a considerate moral to live by. It's a lesson I’d like my children to live by now.

So do we really mean what we say? I’d say yes, in most cases we share our understanding and values with others using words that mean something to us. In that space between ourselves and others though, there’s opportunity for misunderstanding and that difference between intention and impact emerges.

We all make our own meaning. From ourselves, our environment, other people, the words we hear, speak and read. Theres no right or wrong, just variation and depth of understanding which we can greater appreciate through inquiry.

Before announcing there’s going to be a change in process, ask others; “When I say process, what does that mean to you?”. Before adopting a healthy eating regime, ask yourself; “When I say healthy, what does that mean to me?”.

Whether you’re asking yourself or others, the answers you get may be surprising and will certainly help to successfully and collaboratively navigate the gap between intention and impact.

Commit2Coaching offers tailored packages for individuals or teams. Whether you’re looking to:

  • Make a personal change

  • Make professional change

  • Leading others through change

 

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